I ran across some writings that I did while in the middle of my divorce a few years ago. I think this is worth sharing especially if you are finding your life in a tough situation. At the time I never knew from week to week where my young son and I would be living or what the outcome of the divorce would be. I think you will see that God was my foundation and Christ was my rock of truth!
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I am sitting here, wondering what the next week, the next month, and the next year will bring for me. I love God, and I have come to trust God in ways I never thought possible in my life. So, what is the problem? Perhaps it is the unknown.
I feel like Daniel who was thrown in the lion’s den at the ripe old age of eighty. He trusted God to take care of him, and for eighty years God did exactly that, but then Daniel found himself in the worst possible situation…the king whom he thought was a friend and one that understood all that he was about, listened to the other camp, you know, the ones that said there should be a law that allowed the only prayer to be to the king…quite an ego boast for a king and of course his vanity forgot all about his old friend Daniel’s ritual of prayer three times a day to the living God. Well here is Daniel, old, feeling a tad bit useless, and thinking…okay…God where are you? What next? You surely don’t think I will survive being thrown to the lions do you, I mean, they haven’t been fed for days and they will shred me to pieces. Oh well, it will be alright with me if that’s the plan you have for me, because I will be with you just that much sooner and I know that you will take care of my family after I’m gone, just as you have taken care of me all these years. I can’t see any purpose in all of this, but I’m ready to be eaten. The toss, the fear, the thud…then what?
Nothing! Absolutely nothing, except of course, a few sore muscles and bones from the fall. The lions blinked as they looked at Daniel, and they yawned, then licked themselves and rolled over and went to sleep. Daniel, however, must have been thinking…Wow! Now what? Do I move? Do I wait? Do I pray…..yes…yes, that’s it; I will pray and thank the God of all Heaven, the one true God, thank Him and praise Him and ask Him, what next?
Yes, I feel like Daniel, and I wonder what next? The situation I find myself isn’t one of my making, it isn’t my fault, and there is nothing fair about it. What next? I will sit, and be still and thank God for bringing me through the storms of life, and praise the creator of all of heaven, praise Him that He loves me enough to remember my name, to remember my needs, and to fulfill them one by one as the need arises. What next? I don’t know, but God does and that will be enough for me. But, one day, just like Daniel, I will be let out of this situation, just like Daniel was let out of the lion’s pit. Then, like Daniel, I will be free from the fear of that situation and into a new situation…for Daniel the new situation was what the King would do with him.
For me, it is what will the divorce do for me or to me? I didn’t want it, I didn’t create it, and I didn’t desire it to happen…but I’m stuck with it and all the consequences it has created. God will guide me, of that I am completely sure…just as He always has guided me…just as He created me and has a plan for the rest of my life. I will trust, pray, praise, and continue to listen to the word of God. Oh, and I will be okay because I am a princess of God’s! How awesome!
God is with you too, friend, as you navigate the dark waters of divorce. There will always be light available for you if you are a Christian. You will never be alone even when your head says you have been abandoned by your spouse, don’t confuse this abandonment with God because God never leaves His children. Take comfort in that. If you are not a Christian, then talk to someone to learn about God’s mercy and love. Living in God’s forgiveness is so much better than living without God. It gives you a compass for your life, a guide to a joy the world cannot offer, pure joy from God alone.
What’s the best thing that has ever happened to you in your life? Now, think before you answer, what is the best thing? “Best”…something that is better than everything else…”thing”…something that is…”ever”…..a span of time that encompasses every moment that you have ever breathed until this very moment…”happened to you”…not your Mom nor your Dad nor your spouse nor your kids nor your best friend but to you! Have an answer yet? Yes? What?
God! God? Yes, God! God is the best thing that has ever happened to me in my entire life.
For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalm 139:13-14, (New International Version or NIV).
Before I was born, while I was forming in my Mother’s womb, God was there, instructing the bones to grow, the muscles to develop, and all the stitches that make up the human body, God formed. When I was born, God was there to help me enter this world with a healthy set of lungs, ten fingers and ten toes, and my own personality. More importantly, God also had a plan for me, and knew what I would do in my lifetime, what trials I would endure, what pursuits I would attempt, my failures, my successes, my goals and my desires. God knows everything, even what I am doing right now, even though I must confess something to you, I don’t know what I am doing right now, but I am comforted in the knowledge that God knows and that God will work it all together for His glory and my good. That is a promise found in Romans.
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers, Romans 8:28 (NIV).
Of course there is a catch to that promise…you must love God. To some of us, this love for God comes easily, but I think for others it is tough to love God. Why? Because living a life for God is not as easy as it sounds. To live a lifetime loving God requires knowledge of the things of God, found only in reading the Bible; also, we are in a race, as the Apostle Paul wrote:
I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day-and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing, II Timothy 4:7-8, (NIV).
We are to run with endurance and perseverance. Some people get tired and falter along the way, some drop out saying it is too tough, but some of us run with heart…we run because we love God and don’t want to let Him down by stumbling. It is those runners that understand the mystery of being a Christian, mainly, that you leave your self-centered, self-filled, self-motivated personality at the foot of the cross, and you forget what you want and strive to see the bigger picture, that there is no room for self in God’s kingdom.
Oh, and one more thing…you are not alone. You have God and all his children to help you in the journey. I always like to say that when I get to heaven, blood ties that I was bound to on earth will no longer apply. Why? Because the only blood-tie that is relevant in heaven will be the blood of Jesus…if you have the blood of Jesus flowing through you then you are my relative, but if you don’t have the blood of Christ flowing through you, then you are not my brother or sister and I no longer am bound to you by earthly family blood-lines or marriage. Isn’t that the greatest thing? To have such a large family of supporters cheering you on as you cross the finish line of life? How cool is that!
Until next time…Katherine